Come see the fun house mirror of Jenna Jameson

If You were to launch a huge bottle rocket with Jenna Jameson straped on to it on the forth of July, captured it all on film, and then looked at the footage frame by frame, right on the second frame as it explodes into an array of colors in the sky, at one point you would see Jenna turn into Amanda leopore, then get splattered all over the sky,

Cats are out, Dead mice are in this fall!

So as I wrote a blog awhile back, Stating that cats were the latest "Fashion Pet" trend for fall 07. Well....toss your Feline friends aside, and Get a dead mouse broache, as seen here on Marc Jacobs A.I.D's 401k boyfriend. Yes, This Black plauge cotour piece Given to him by Courtney Love. Acording to TMZ, he refuses to take it off because it was given to him from the crack pot. She was probably smoking heroin with that mouse, her only friend in the world. At one point she probably thought that Kurt was probably reincarnated into that mouse.
I guess I should not really attack the gift, or the giver. But really attack the real story at hand...Who gives Marc Jacobs boyfriends gifts? Does anybody know his name besides Marc and Courtney?

Full Puss...

Our favorite lil' meth head is gonna have her own little meth buddy soon. Jody Sweedin Submitted her ultra sound pictures to TMZ today, as if we care about anything she does with her life. She should expect to get NO attention, she had tons of experiance with that on Full house.
Hmmmm...how much did TMZ give her for that ultra sound? A quarter and a some raisin bran? Thats what I would have given her for and early picture of baby Sweedin. Poor kid, and by that I mean lil' Jody.
In 5 years expect TMZ to post this on their site:

with this headline: " a picture of Baby sweedin having flashbacks from the womb".

Seriously...

I don't even know why I'm writing about Britney's performance oon the VMA's last night, But here I go. Seriously guys????? Did people actually expect Britney to make this spectacular come back? All the talk about her through out the year was proof enough that her big bang was going to be a small fart. Thats Like you expecting me to be part of the 2008 Olympics, but all you see me do is eat Mcdonalds and watch t.v all day, and hear me say...I'll work out tommorow.
A lot of yuo guys were expecting a "Charlette's web" story, where in the mist of all this talk about A dead popstar, she would come back and be "Remarkable", when really...all she ended up being was "some pig".

The birth defects of MOD

Did you ever want to know what having sex on a vespas would produce? Take a look at Paul wellers Son! Holy Crap! JAM MAN!.....Forget singing about a town called malice, start singing about your son named Alice!

ROBO PUSS

Along with baby wee-wee, I think I found another stocking stuffer for this Christmas. Meet Robo cat, Yes...A cat thats robotic and responds to things you do. You can rub its back and She purrs, or pull her tail and In 10 seconds you get a response!.

Why is he so lovable? Robo puss came Just in time for the artificial love movement sweeping the world! I can't wait to get my hands on this Lil' Puss. With my evil mind, I could do wonders. Imagine, Me throwing the cat in the ocean. Watching people react with disbelief, as I throw this MeowingCat gets flung inot the ocean. But then people would really get startled when Fluffy starts smoking and male-functioning. I would scream "WET CAT BOMB"!!!!!, then laugh as people run in panic. I would Probably get arrested and get sent to prison.

Hmmmm...maybe Robo cat Is'nt such a good toy for me to have. Maybe I should just buy the robo chic.

I mean, talk about a toy thats a one trick pony

I guess we as a growing planet have to accept the progress in the world of toys. I mean if we can tickle the fuck out of elmo, why cant we have a doll with an uncircumsized Pee pee that urinates on comand?

Do you feel dirty yet? I bet you do! I love how its the most annoying toy in the world. How it constantly just says "mommy, mommy, wee-wee, wee-wee". They should call this wreck of a doll baby poo poo, just by the way he walks, it looks like he has a present for you and it aint Wee-wee. If any sick,mindless child in decides this is what she wants for a gift, I would have her head examined. Even worst, imagine if your son wanted it!...yikes.

Seperated at birth

Muchie goes clubbing

Its sad when all your friends are trying to take a normal "My space" picture and your obnoxious friend pee's all over it. This moron jumps in front, with his Ever so Ironic dinosaur shirt and his courderoy blazer, that probably smells like old syrup, jumps in at the last minute and ruins the picture. This guy probably thinks he is such a comedian. Before he discovered thrift stores and The killers, he probably spent his saturdays watching "Ace Ventura: Pet detective" and thought it was the best movie in the world. This guy never gets laid I bet, his monster eyebrows get more attention than he does. This guy looks like a love child between a dinosaur and a caveman with cerebral palsy.
Is'nt this guy famouse too? I think he is. I could have sworn he was in a movie.....

Totally seperated at birth.....,

Tiddy bear's will save us all

Seperated at birth

Lauryn Hill is : Harpo marx or an angry poodle with make-up on. YOU MAKE THE CALL!

Big Car, Little drunk

TLC's "Little people, Big World" star, Matthew Roloff, was aressted for D.U.I on Jun 19. Police pulled over lil' Matt because his mini van was swerving on the road.

In my opinion, The police pulled Midgy Matt over because they maybe thought he was a freakeshly large child behind the wheel. They should have just Arrested him for being a Midget driving a car, pulled over and Arrested for M.U.I, MIDGET UNDER the Influence. I have never seen a Midget driving a car, and would probably not want to, unless I had a death wish. Just imagine, a drunk midget in a mini-van.....WATCH OUT!!!! A story like this is straight out of a John waters film.

Could'nt he have played the 'Little Person" card, and say the officers "Give me a break!!! I'm a midget driving a car!!" and then put a spell on them like Midgets do.

Sunday, Monday "NAPPY DAYS"!!!

I remember in the earlie 80's when the "Happy Days" was in sindication, but still going on chanel 7. Still put-put'n along, like that beat up old truck on the freeway, doing 30 in a 60 mph lane. The poor show caught up tp speed and the whole cast soon became 80's in the 1960's. The only Character that satyed the same for the whole 11 years, was Good ol' Fonzie. motorcycle jacket( more like a members only jacket) white t-shirt, blue jeans, and motorcycle boots, that look was here to stay. Talk about dedication.

New cast members came and went. "Arnolds" Got a new owner, Mr. Miagi from the "karate Kid" series, I don't know the actors name, but he will always be Mr,miagi to me. Was he Japanese or a korean, I don't know, but Like everything else in the 80's, It went under "NEW" managment. I'm suprised "Arnolds" did not start serving Teriyaki chicken Bowls.

The show had a couple sucesful spin offs, Lavern and Shirley and Mork and Mindy. One short lived spin off that flopped, was "Jonie loves Chachi".

Why give us this Crap? The viewers out in T.V. land want shows about Aliens named Mork, and Two lesbians living in Milwaukee. I would have rather watched a show simply called "Chachi". I mean I loved "Charles in charge", that was HIt! Same Idea, but he loves kids.

I blame the demise of The "Happy Days" empire on lil Mrs. kentucky fried hair, Erin Moran.

Now these days she's looking all hot, as in BURNT! She looks like a burnt victim. Was she in a fire and no one told the public? Look at her hair, its all nasty and over processed, it all looks as if she had a bad perm acciedent.

Her hair stylist probably answered her suggestion of a "new look" and deep fryed her hair.

i don't Know what Erin Is doing these days, She is probably on some stupid "tell all" book tour about the sexually abusive cast and how she is scared for life. Oh Erin Moran,.....its more like EVEN MORONIC. Heres a little "MORAN" trivia, Erins brother, Tony Moran, was the person behind the mask of "Micheal Myers" in the first halloween. So creepy, oh...those darn MORANS!

Stop the PRESS!!!!: Trend forcast for fall 2007

Chihuahuas and African babies are out this fall, Acording to this picture I found on a fashion forcast website. Its all about big fat pussys as an accessorie.

I hate when people try to come up with an Ironic trends, especially a living thing that they can decorate with expensive cloths and jewlery. What are people gonna start doing now? Act like villans wth this new cat Trend? Are we gonna see Fashionistas petting their Puss, with a black bob, big black glasses, white pearls, and a black turtle neck uni-tard, Laughing diabolically, as they order their Mocha-frapacino?

I think I'm gonna start a new trend, to counter act the stupiness of the whole pet craze. I might get a midget, and call him an imidget. I would make him or her matching outfits, to cordinate with mine. so...My trend forcast this season...is midgets..in every color and all sizes. Get rid of your man bag, fellas, you new "accessory" can carry your new iphone.

CASA DE VINO!!!

Someone needs to go to the mall instead of rehab! and buy a new outfit. Amy must be rich, Cause everytime I see her, she is in this outfitt and it loks like she spends no money on cloths. But, Geez, Amy, stop wearing light colors if your gonna wear that outfitt all the time.

I mean Britney looks well put together more than Amy, and britney is nuts. I love Amy Winehouse, I really do. But get some glamour girl! please! do it for your country, or something, anything. When I first saw amys look, I thought to myself " Oh cool....someone is rocking the bee-hives....and that girls are gonna start looking like elvira, finally something new, an upadate to Greasy hair".

Spice Girl reunion= Heart burn

Its been a couple years since the "Spice Girls" decided that Sharing the spolight is not they're cup of tea, and departed. I don't even rember when they broke up, but honsestly, I don't think no one cared, Maybe the only one who cared was some shoe company that just put in an order for 50 thousand pairs of british flag plattform sneakers, did give a shit.
So now its 2007,and With a few failed attempts as solo artist, and Posh getting all the attention and the tanning creams, the "Spice Girls" decide to reunite for one more dose of Girl power.
I mean...I'm kind of excited to see what they'll do. Like what will be they're hook. Will Posh spice even open her mouth? Or will she just pose there like a skinny, Squeezed orange,with that expression on her face. You know that that stupid expression, That one that your mom would give you, when you were doing something bad. Where her eyes get all huge, and her stare is so peircing, you know what her eyes are saying.
I think they should not get back together, they should just keep on doing what they're doing. I mean I don't miss the spice girls. But when I do miss them, I just go to the local 99 cent store, and in the toy section, next to the mexican Barbie, you have all the spice girls figurines you can have, for 99 cents, and thats enough "spice" in my life.

BAD! BAD! BAD! Child actor pt 1

I think this Is my favorite thing in the world of pop culture, or generally in life itself, Child actors who come out of their closet of some sort. We all tend to look forward to gossip or can't Beileive that Lil So-n-so would be gay or addicted to drugs. But why not? Their only human and can get addicted or have a bad streak of luck. I guess we see the their Characters, like Lil Steph from "Full House" Be adicted to meth. I'm not Lauging at addiction, but I do laugh at who gets addicted. Stephanie tanner? Addicted to meth? WHAT?!?! What happend to that clean, holsome, lil girl that got up staged by twins and an older sister who dealt with her weight?. What Happend to that lil sweetie who lost her cuteness by the second season? WHere is that Little firecraker who rode the shirt tales of 3 older men and one gloden Retriver? Why would she ever do such a thing? better yet...WHO WOULD GET STEPHANIE TANNER HOOKED ON METH?????I don' know....but I know her evil twin is doing meth. Maybe it was uncle Jessie that did it. I mean he did ride motorcycles and was into that stuff called "ROCK "N" ROLL". And you know what goes along with "ROCK "N" ROLL", women, Booze and METH! Maybe it was Danny Tanner...HER FAUX-FATHER! I mean if I had to work with "SAGGOT"( as I like to call him, drop the Bob, its useless)I would be on some sort of drug. It was not uncle Joey, He was on acid. I know who it was!!! Prime suspect #1! KIMMIE GIBBLER!!!! I mean I did blog about her a while ago (go down and you'll read) And I predicted that she would be a "NARCOTIC NANCY" by now.
BOO-HOO! to Hollywood, turning good people into Rich, useless, problem cases. But who would not kill to have been a child actor all grown up, Telling the world about how you got addicted to some narcotic, and fucked Mick Jagger.

You don't have to wear plattform sandles, to have an attitude

What happend to Cool? Is this picture of Prince in plattform sandles the memo to let us all know "Cool is dead"?

Money troubles call for Shasta..

There are Coke drinkers and then there are shasta Drinkers. I don't think I ever heard the "shasta" answer in the "which do you prefer Coke or pepsi?" challenge. I always grew up with coke, and my parents never bought us shasta. It was always looked down upon, and was as prestiges as a food stamp.
When you went over to your friends house, and they served you "COKE", you would taste it and think to yourself...."This ain't COKE!!! this is Shasta...they must be having money troubles". Which soda gives you more bang for your buck? Shasta does! Where else can you get 3 liters of soda for .99 cents... that big ass bottle that can't even fit in your fridge. So you leave it out, "yum!!!I Yes!!! I would love some hot, flat Shasta!!!" I mean C'mon, Who buys regular "shasta'? I mean you can splurge since your being cheap or you poor, to get a flavor one like black cherry, or take the "pinapple" flavor challenge.
You can tell so much about "the soft drnk" experiance when you were raised in the ghetto. You saw your R.C. colas, Store brand sodas, but when my friend gave me Kool-Aid, I thought..."ok...he's not going to college".

One hit wonder Part 2

Oh...Jane child...where art thou? I don't know, but I do think about you a lot. " I don't want to fall in love" was such a good "synth" song. But then like a magician, you did your trick, and POOF, you disappeared.
You had your crazy look going, which caught all of our attention first. Your hairdo was what sold me. It was like you were paying omage to the Romans that fought in the lions den. The Spikey top reminded me of roman guards helmet bristle top. kind of like barley swaying in the breeze. And the long braids represented the whips that beat down the lions, in the lions den. Your signiture look was something that no one could mimic, with out knowing that you did it firts., Your nose/ear ring chain thingy. So cutting edge. You were so the streets of New York, as you Played your keyboard like a bad girl playing a pinball machine at a pizza parlor.
Come back please, do a reality show or something....Geez....

Food letters

Dear Egg Salad Sandwich,
Today I had you on the way to work. I was going to save you for lunch, but I could not. You are, to me, an embarassing thing to eat. You smell and your messy. This morning I stared at you in your plastic zip lock bag, and trying to get myself to chow on you. I opened the bag and got a strong wiff of who you really are, Your just a fancy egg, thats all, lathered in Mayo. I drove with one hand on the wheel and one hand on you covered in plastic. I was not hungry, but hought, I better eat you cause I'm broke and I need to eat. You were there, like a slutty friend. You did the job, but left me with a lot of remourse. I was gorging you down, like a kid thinking the best way to hide his candy, is to eat it all, stuff it all in his mouth.
So, now, My car stinks like a sewer, and I'm having flashbacks of you, like a Vietnam vet. Now the only thing that reflects in my head, is the used baggie left in my car, like dirty bed sheets. That are stained and also stain your memory. I know there are people out there that love you, but I don't.

Sorry.
MP

bad costume #4

I think This one bugs me the most. Talk about putting no effort into it. Maybe he still wanted to remain a "hot guy" and did not put on make-up. Or maybe He thought that make-up of any sort and halloween is for "fags" and "hot fairies".
So he puts on Some crazy contacts and some cobwebs and calls himself a zombie. who are you kidding? You are not a ZOMBIE!!!! I protest this costume! I would have sent him home or punched him in the face and made him more realistic. I mean, C'mon,....they were not even clever enough to call him A "AmberZOMBIE".

bad costume #3

Her name is probably "Pam" not short for Pamella, but just simply Pam. Pam, as in..."Halloween for me, is my night to pass out candy....if I don't eat all the almond joys first".
She is one of those girls that never dresses up, and on halloween tends to show her wild side, Which is putting on her "PAYLES: B.O.G.O" plattform sandles, and calling herself a disco dancer.
I'm sorry Pam...but I don't see disco dancer, I see "almond joy" eater, but not disco dancer.

Bad costume #2

This is a all time safe "fat" girl costume, because any skinny girl would be a sexy witch. Its only fun when you do it right, though. I love how her nose does not match her skin, I think She is a "witch" that should have had better planing. It would have been A prize winning costume if she ahd told everybody that she was going as a witch that got hit by a truck.

Bad costume #1

I know its too early for Halloween, but I think, maybe its a good time to reflect on bad costumes from seasons past. This costume is simply called "Dead girl". There should be rules to halloween, especially at work, when the suggestion, "everyone Must participate" gets costumes like this. She probably thought she was genius to partipate by throwing fake blood on her face and saying "I'm a Dead girl, SHOOT!". Well...Gun shot victim, maybe, Bloody pigeon poop face, Ok, Period face...now were talking.
.

I want to kiss you all over PART 1

Ok....I watched this video, and I don't know whats going on. Is it a mail order bride video?

Brought to you by "Ermine"

I've heard this song before, like on Kbig or the Kost. I've always wondered who sang it, and If it was ever worthy of anything. Cliff richards is his name, and making a girl realize that he won't talk to her anymore, is his game. I love the excitement in the air In this video. The fog machines, the neon lights, the stale crowd. This is video is golden.

I look at it and totally see myself singing Karaoke, seriously, this is totally me. I think I have even searched for this song to sing for Karaoke. This video I hate, I love. I think the part that realy sold me was, not his red tie and black shiny outfit, but that this video is brought to you by a ferret named Ermine.

Do me in the BOT

I don't have any complaints about this, I actually love it. Lately I have switched taste from pigs and ghoulies, to Hippos and robots. I came across this Orgasmic treasure, wich I will forever hold close to my heart. "Automatic lover" by Dee D. Jackson. Its about a girl in love with a robot, thats all.

HATE today

I was quickly reminded today Of Mika, and why I hate him. I was thumbing through a shared Itunes library, and The Mika C.D was on there. I thought to myself, Maybe I was being to hard on Mika. Maybe his C.D. is really good, and that I was judging him on one song of his "love Today". I mean I did give Amy winehouse a second shot and she has became a Consecutive C.D. pick of mine.

So...I listened, Skimming through songs...and the verdic ist.....Just as I thought.....I STILL CAN"T STAND HIM! I was right all this time. Why did I second guess myself? I should have stuck to my hate, and watch him fade away like a bad caker sore. I don't know how anyone could listen to his C.D. and say he is so great. I just hate his Pseudo homosexual vibe, his wanna be falsetto voice, and his "child like" music. Crap? yes Pop? Afraid so. I know he is popular in England, and I think He has gone away, like that bad canker sore away from Americas big mouth.
I mean, Have we not learned from Leo sayer and his one hit from the 70's "you make me feel like dancing'? Don't you remember him?..............Thats what I thought...point proven. sad to think that you can google him and read about him, listen to his song and still....you don't remember.

I also remeber my Ex bought that single "love Today". He tried to suprise me. He played it, and started to dance and sing it, like he pictured it in his head and memorized the words. HE thought that would make me find him Irrisistable, and love him forever for being "So cute". But all I saw was a life-size "ALF" like face singing "love today". I wanted to punch him in the stomach and run away, like as if I was 5 and scared of clowns.

Tell it to my humps

Every generation has its Repeat "Celebratie". You have your No doubt as the new Blondie, Your Coldplay as our new U.2. Then you have our new Taylor dane, FERGIE. Yes...have we not noticed? She is simply Taylor with more money and more "soul".
Who let either of them be famouse? Who said it was best if white women with soultry voices be top 40? Why must fergie try to apeal to me, with her "flossy, flossy" talk and expect me to understand her? Taylor Dane made it simple to us. She did not try to apeal to the lingo of the decade. I'm pretty sure Taylor dane would not be as well know if she sang "tell it to my heart, dude".

Everybody get Horny now...

Pictures like this seem to have revived my "gay" spirits, for a while I've been such a negative nelie on everything and anything gay. I Stumbled upon this Autographed pleasure of Tony Danza, and Dirty disco and Dirty thoughts flew through my head. Basically, it knocked some gay sence in me. I'm not one to look at porn or nudie magazines and get struck with thoughts of Bopping the bologna. I mean, I don't waist my time with porn anymore, really, in porno you know what happens in the end, Basiaclly, everyone wins. And porn mags, How can your prop it up and turn the pages, and indulge in the festivities at hand, no pun intendend,
But everything about this picture might turn me into a pervert for a Night...or two.I look at Mr. Danza in this Homo-erotic pose and think "this is kind of hot, no...this is HOT!!!!". How does this picture differ from any other half-naked beef cake picture outthere? Is it because we all know him as a dominant character, the "BOSS"? or does he just remind me of those cute little boys that I would get crushes on in grade school? Many gay uys remeber those kids. Your actual first "gay" Realization. They would come over, and in my sitiuation so go Swimming, and were willing to exchange Sexual favors for a dip in the pool.

I can think and think about it over and over again, but one thing is for sure, this picture looks like a really good peice of Pepporoni pizza. And Pepporoni pizza sounds really good right now.

Seperated at birth....

John Travolta is gay, and his son is ugly. Let's take a look at people and things I think Lil' Johnny ( I don't know if thats his real name, but its the name I'm giving to him) looks like:

BAT BOY

Butch Patrick

Rosane Rosana danna

nosferatu

The Goddess Bunny

And finally.....This thing......

Poo-poo pee poop

Anyone who has known me for along time, has felt my hate for Betty Boop. I was deciding on never doing a blog about my most hated nemesis, but I have writers block, and I figure "venting" about this hooker, wil get my hate back. I can't stand how she is what America hates. She dresses like a slut, men chaising her left and right, basically a cartoon Paris Hilton. If we can hate Paris Hilton, why can't we ban Betty?. but America embraces her with open arms, or "boop's" with her.
You can find anything and everything made for the Betty Boop fan, and that makes me sick. How much praise can you give to this stupid cartoon character? Let's ban the boop, NOW! Lets treat the people that love Betty, like the people that wear fur. If we see some fat soccor mom, wearing a shirt with Betty Boop on it, riding a Harley Davidson, lets fling poo on her, and run like hell.
If you read this blog, and you share my veiw on "UGLY BETTY BOOP", thank you, and continue to hate. If not for you, but for me. But if your reading this, and you laugh as you take a sip from a Betty Boop mug, put the mug down, and sock yourself in the face, thats what I would do if I was there with you. Because thats what I prefer to do, Punch if you BOOP!

...Oh no....John Invited his friend, you know...that girl

We all know her. She is a friend of a friend. The on that comes along and wants to do nothing but get drunk and high. She is the one that you can't find at the end of the night, and your her only ride home. She is the one that invites her equaly disturbing friends along, with out your permision. She is also the one that comes up to you at the end of the club, with lipstick on her teeth, one shoe in her hand, asks you to give her a ride home. You refuse, because your smart, and as you drive off, you see her hitchhiking on Sunset at 3:30 in the morning.

Thank you for being a friend...

I love Bea Arthur for many reasons, and one of those reasons is that she can laugh at herself. So...I'm Ok with making fun of this video. The chickens in the video,well,lets just call in Death by association, With no pun intendended.
The "Golden girls" Decided to become Animal right advocates, and try to spread the word on Animal Cruelty. Betty white Will give you a sugar coated speach about taking care of your pets, and, well, Bea, she loves chickens. She Reveils the cruel, dark side of the poultry industry in this video, But mainly attacks K.F.C.
K.F.C is the most hated chicken franchise in the world, I can understand why. When you decide to toss everyhting on the menu in a little bowl, you know thats a colon blow for you pleasure. So..Not only does Bea stand behind her chicken sisters, but honestly, I think she looks like an old chicken. A "Golden" fried chicken.
You don't have to watch this video, but just know its on here. If you decide to watch it, I have to warn you, its pretty graphic.

Happy Hemoglobin=Happy Hemo-goblin

What matches with red?....Red of course, silly. I'm determand that this is a Human sprite, from Rainbow Bright.

Lana=Sexual harassment

There was something creepy about Lana, AKA "Lanahead", on Three's Company. Ann Wedgworth's character was thought to add some, spice, or should I say some "Horny" to the set of the show. Watching her character grope Jack and act like she was about to Orgasm every Freak'n 5 seconds, made me feel so awkward. When there was a knock at the door and it was Lana asking for a cup of sugar, you knew the perversion was about to start. All the scenes she was in was like watching your friends dog try to hump everything in site, and then come to you with his lipstick still full charged and ready to go, and you were scared to pet him.

Act you age momma, not your shoe size...

I know I have a couple years befor I start to look and feel like this at any show I go to. But I know, and I accept, that, me trying to prove to anyone, that I'm still in the know, will expire. What about those people that just don't get it? (like my ex)? I saw this picture, and I thought, Why is this man wearing a shirt of "The sounds"? Does he even know who they are? Probably not, he probably just liked the graphic. This is how my ex's going to be....old, and still dressing like an awkward teenager, that does not match, and will discover things too late. It's sad enough that he has a myspace page, and started it at the age 35. who does that?

Drowning your sorrow in Horseysauce

Ohhhh...Arbys....I'll be the first person to stand up and speak on your behalf. I know you are viewed as the worst place to eat, but you treat me soooo good. Sometimes, I do get so hungry, I would eat arbys. Well...sometimes you get so depressed, you would eat Arbys, well, at least I did. This Happened to me about a month and half ago. I had just gotten out of my realtinship and was lost. I would drive around aimlesly, and felt, like I was going knowhere in my life. I thought that one day, it would be a great cheer up if I indulged in an "Arbys" roast beef sandwich, culrley fries, and the magic mixture of Horsey sauce and Arbys House sauce, wich is basically ketchup, proabably made from old tomatoes.
So, to make a long story short, I grab my order, and make my way to the back of the empty resturaunt. Ok...so did you catch that last sentence? ....."EMPTY". Yeah....there is nothing more depressing than eating In an empty arbys, as you gorge on roast beef. I felt so pathetic. I knew I hit rock bottom. I was embarrased and depressed, as I poured the arby sauce all over everything. I think A tear even fell in my horsey sauce.
Well...I've come up leaps and bounds since then, and life is better than what It was befor. I have not been back to an arbys since, and I don't plain on it anytime soon. I guess a good realization came to me, as I bit into the massive sandwich of meat. The relationship I was in, was the Arbys of relationship.

Who's the FAG?

You can sometimes look at a kid, and without him saying a word, your know the kid is going to be a flamming queen, when he grows up. One of those kids were Danny Pintauro. He was such a fag. Everytime I watched "Who's the Boss?" I would wonder, "Is that how people look at me?". From what I've heard, is that Danny is out of the "broom" closet, and posted some sex add on some gay website. I have to admit, that In some Horny,single gay guy way, I'd do him. I think I would love to Say "So....DANNY! WHO"S THE BOSS,NOW?", as I cum on his face.

TRYA MAIL!!!!!!

I love how Tyra views herself as the "Pope" of anything to do with modeling. She has made herself a legend in her own big, Alien, shaped head. I used to love Americas next top model, I watched it religiously ,but Not so much anymore. I used to tune in to see her gloat when she upstages these poor, hopeless .girls who are not models. A good majority of the girls that enter this contest are young, teen moms who have the metabolism that everyone want. Maybe this show should be called "Americas next top Metabolism".
Allot of these girls have never been in front of a professional photographer befor. They are expected to turn into cinderella in front of Trya and the panel of, not-so famous judges, with one photo. Tyra gives direction and expects gold to come out of their assholes. Poor Tyra, she is such a know-it-all.

The show is deigned with nothing but critique and harsh conditions, that would not make me want to be a model. It seems when these girls do nothing but wrong poses, they are looked at as "Ugly Bitches" by an Ugly bitch himself, Mrs. J. Theese poor, clueless girls get placed in the worst of conditions, and are expected to Strike a pose. Thats not fair, the worst condition Tyra has been introduced to was wearing 5 lb's of feathers in A Victoria Secrets fashion show.
Tyra will come up with a stupid "challenges. like put these girls that can't swim, in a fish tank full of pirhanas. Then she tell's them that modeling is all about facing your fears, because the fashion industry is so harsh, the buisness is right up there with Piranhas. Kudos to you Tyra, Thanks for selling the fashion industry as a fun place to work.
After veiwing the photos, Tyra throws in he two cents, when Know one even asked for a penny. Tyra, just to prove her point of being a "top Model", would jump in a kiddie pool full of gold fish, Comparing it to a fish tank full of Pirhanas.and tells the girls "You need more HUMPH.....and a lot's Less HUMPH, like this", she'll do a stupid looking face.
I love to hate this show because its not even about modeling, it's about helping girls realize that "Ty-Ty baby" Is a goddess and they are not. Another thing to tune in for is the massive weight gain tyra has adapted. Who are you trying to kid, Tyra? We knew you would get fat, you bring your mom along for every freak'n talk show. She is your Ed Mcman. HIIII-YOOOOO. When ever you get bored and your watching the show, If your lucky, maybe Tyra will be wearing a tank top. Take a look at her pits. you will soon get a glimps of a set of Americas next tip baby vagina armpits.

This is why I love Coke..

There was something about this child actress, Hallie Eisenberg, that was kind of in a demonic nature. I use to get scared when these pepsi commercials would come on and she would be in them. I always thought she was so annoying looking, kind of like when someone has something on there face, and you don't want to tell them cause your embarassed to tell them. You just get affixed on it and you hope it falls off or something. But in Hallies case, pray for the commercial to end. I always thought she looked like a possum with a bad Olgavie home perm.

So...where is she now? and how old is she now? Is she gonna be on Greys Anatomy as a guest nurse, so tabloids can write articles titled "ALL GROWN UP". But now look at what we have here:

Its Hallie, all grown up, but looks the same, scary. This picture made me feel funny, kind of gross. Why is she wearing short-shorts? This picture came as an added plus when I googled her name, and frankly, stumbling on to this picture was like getting all excited when you were young, to look at your dads prorno stash. When your dad leaves, you go and you look for the best one, but in the mix, you find naked pictures of your mom.